Wednesday, August 6, 2008

me and bella swann/cullen

feel like im moving backwards in time.
away from who i was in boston...
pixie dancing smiling kissing beauty girl

past who i was at nyack
naive silly self-steryotype wierd waldorf girl

back to who i was at green meadow
just katie

i want to get a tan
not to impress anyone
who to feel like i am healthy and not ghostly
i just want to get a tan
i dont want to go to the beach
just the tan

i want to buy clothing
not to wear to something exciting
not to feel like the kind of person who i want to feel like
the kind that is wearing that clothing
i just want it
to wear it when i leave my house probobly leaving just to buy more clothing

id also like to be awake
to leave my bed and its dusty sheets and antifeminist guilty pleasure novels.
i dont care about bella and her vampire love and her vampire human baby
she shouldnt have become a vampire
a feminist wouldnt have made her one
would have made her her own thing
instead she just lived happily ever after
in modern fairytales the princess gets the prince and then realized she doesnt want him

in classic fairy tales she gets the prince the end.
classic fairy tales are classics because they arnt written anymore
because our heroines are supposed to be
bellas happy ending?
beautiful vampire husband child and self.
happily ever bloodsuckingly after.

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