Thursday, September 17, 2009
i have a girl who isnt real.
shes mine. i love her.
we swim together in the ocean with some guys. (adam and jake are there.)
when it starts to get too cold i carry her inside. we're at a hotel. theres a pool its green and blue, not in a dirty way, in a chloriney way.
i turn a switch in her neck and she turns on and i drop her into the water.
"this is where im supposed to swim?" shes disgusted. she thinks the water isnt real water.
there are old men watching us. i dont want them to know that shes not real.
i am carrying her, shes the same girl but shes a child, a toddler.
we are at the same hotel but it feels like a mall... no a fair. there are people carrying around cotton candy and like... corn dogs.
im carrying my unreal girl. she has her arms around my neck, shes "asleep" she smells like plastic. i dont want anyone to know that shes not real.
three men, two father age and one college age step into step beside me. they ask me where her father is, where the rest of my family is. theyre flirting with me, wondering if i have a husband.
i tell them that im fine with just her. i pat her back. she puts her hand on my cheek because shes alive.
she feels a little too light and she has a screw in her neck.
i keep wondering if i should have stayed in the ocean with the boys. i feel too responsible here with this child who is a child and i am responsible for her but also i am responsibe for making sure no one finds out the truth.
ive lost her. me and someone else who i know (ive forgotten but it might have been molly...) are looking for her. i dont want anyone to see her, dont want anyone to find out that shes not real.
Written by Katie at 9:51 AM